Chicken Soup for the Atlantis Soul
by the-Bookworm-Princess
Summary: Series of unrelated John/Evie one-shots from within my finally-named "Sex, Lies, and Puddlejumpers" 'verse about Sheppard, Evie, Aiden, and co. Contains references through my fic "Growing Pains". 10/50 prompts complete.
1. Innocence

Author's Note: These are series of prompts that I've written for fanfic50 on LiveJournal. They're all John/Evie and they are within my finally named "Sex, Lies, and Puddlejumpers" 'verse that consists so far of "Bound and Determined", "Dirty Little Secret", and "Growing Pains." These one-shots may reference events from any of those three fics, but will not go beyond them, i.e. nothing past Aiden going to college. Since those fics span eighteen years, I'll be nice and put a timeline reference at the beginning of each prompt.

Disclaimer: If you've seen them on the TV show, they're not mine; any other characters belong to me, please don't use them without my permission.

These are all unbetaed, so any mistakes are completely my fault.

* * *

**Prompt #6 - Innocence**

(takes place immediately after John and Evie's marriage ceremony on Venalia)

Evie nervously twisted a strand of hair around her finger. Of course she was a little bit…_turned-on _was probably the right word, she decided. But mostly she was nervous as heck and scared out of her mind. Would it feel good? Could she make _him_ feel good? Would it hurt? Would she actually have to do anything but just lie there?

She knew that John would know exactly what he was doing, and she hoped that _she_ didn't come across as an inexperienced idiot. She hadn't read magazines like _Cosmo_, and she'd never ever looked at porn. Obviously she knew what went where, but that was about the extent of her knowledge.

John had confessed the names of seven other women to her. _Seven_. And two of those had been long-term relationships. He was probably an expert. Probably knew all the hotspots and a zillion positions. Evie glanced over at the bed. He better not expect her to be on top.

She hoped he took a while chopping the wood.

* * *

John hoped it didn't take him much longer to finish chopping the firewood. He respected the hell out of Evie's commitment to wait, but it had taken a good deal of willpower not to jump her during the last two months. And now she was up there in a cozy little bedroom, wearing something naughty Summer had given her. That mental image combined with the incredibly hot kiss she'd given him before running up the stairs… _Horny_ was the right word, John decided.

He hoped she wasn't freaking out. Sure, it was fine for them to both be nervous as hell; he knew every couple's first time had a certain level of accompanying anxiety. He just didn't want her to feel like she was being judged. They'd snuck off to talk candidly last week when they'd decided that they were serious about getting hitched somewhere in Pegasus, and Evie had confessed that she was worried he'd compare her to other girls he'd slept with.

John picked up a fresh log and split it easily. He'd promised her that he wouldn't grade her performance; he'd been a virgin once, too. He'd told her that it was okay that the sex wouldn't be great at first. She'd taken that as an offense and almost started crying, and he'd tried to convince her that the first few times with _anyone_ usually sucked. And, honestly, they did.

But John didn't care; he loved her.

* * *

Evie eyed herself in the mirror critically. She'd taken her hair down and her dangling earrings out. She'd even removed her dogtags and fastened them around her ankle so they wouldn't detract from what she was wearing. She thought she looked good in the lingerie Summer had given her -- sexy, even. It was almost a "teddy"; the red bra-top clasped in the front and had sheer material attached that parted in the front and hung down just past the lacy, scarlet underwear. She looked down at her smallish chest and decided that she was glad the bra wasn't a push-up. What good was false advertising on a wedding night, anyway? She cupped her clothed breasts in her hands and pushed them up a little, creating more cleavage.

She hoped that John would be pleased with her body.

* * *

John wasn't even putting conscious effort into chopping the wood anymore. His mind was already upstairs, imagining them both naked and tangled together under the sheets.

He loved her. _Wanted_ her. Wanted to feel her embrace without three pesky layers of clothing between them. Wanted to feel every curve of her beautiful body. Wanted to taste her skin. Wanted to make her _feel_…

Every time John brought the axe down, the word _gentle_ echoed in his mind. He knew he had to be gentle with her. She'd never done this before. He would have to take things calm and gentle, which was a notch below what he'd dreamt about all last night. He didn't think his feelings were aggressive, just possessive.

And then, the second time, he was going to go _so_ slowly, finding every little spot that made her breathing hitch, made her moan, made her gasp his name. Then when they were spent again, he'd pull her into his arms, feeling her skin against his, and just lay there.

John turned and reached for another piece of wood. There was none. He grinned widely as he swung a last time, embedding the axe blade in the stump. _You are so mine,_ he thought to himself as he dashed up the stairs to the room they'd been given. He knocked on the door, then wondered why he'd done so, and opened it himself.

Evie jumped, pulled abruptly from her self-reflection.

"Little nervous, beautiful?" John teased.

Evie nodded, blushing.

John gave her an easy smile, then entered the bedroom and closed the door behind him.


	2. Touch

**Prompt #40 - Touch**

"Die, die!" Evie cried as she attempted to snipe John from atop a roof during their video game match.

John's CG character quickly hid behind a crumbling wall, then tossed a grenade up onto the roof.

Evie frantically pushed the controls to run away, but her character exploded a second later. "Meany," she scowled.

"What kind of commanding officer would I be if I let you win?"

Seeing that the room was clear of anyone else, she answered teasingly, "A commanding officer who might get lucky tonight."

"You think I'm that easily bribed?" he feigned offense.

She giggled. "Yes. Yes, you are."

John pulled out a grenade, but didn't throw it. In a matter of seconds, his character blew up, raising Evie's score. "How's that?"

Evie giggled again.

"You know, we should get Radek to play with us sometime," John suggested as the game continued. "He's amazing at this game."

"Oww."

"What?"

Evie paused the game. "The baby's kicking me." She smiled and took his hand. "Here, feel." She placed his hand on her abdomen.

"Wow," he smiled when he felt the active moment. "Is he dancing or something?"

"Stretching probably," she answered. "He doesn't have as much room as he used to. Oww, quit it!" she told the child inside.

"So poke him back," John joked.

Evie rubbed the side of her belly. "He's stretching his foot out as far as he can." She pulled up the hem of her shirt. "Do you _ see_ that?"

"Is that his _foot_?" he asked, staring at a small shape that was trying to poke out from her skin. "Doesn't that hurt?"

"Yes, you idiot."

"Holy crap, you can see his _toes_!" John exclaimed, softly brushing his fingertips over the protruding foot. "That is so cool."

"No, it's very painful." She sighed in relief when the baby removed his foot and settled down.

"I still can't believe we're having a baby," John commented.

"What 'we', kimosabe? We'll be lucky if you're even allowed in the delivery room," she replied glumly.

"We'll figure something out, alright?" he assured her. "Even if I have to take hostages, I _will_ be in there with you."

His humor didn't even elicit a smile, as she was too worried about the prospect of having to do this alone. "Promise?"

"I promise." He placed his hand back on her stomach. "We'll do this together, you hear me?" he asked, determination in his gaze.

She breathed and nodded, reaching down to squeeze his hand.

When he decided she was convinced, he picked up his controller again. "Alright. Now come and kick my ass at this game so we can get it on tonight."

Evie just laughed.


	3. Tears

**Prompt #48 - Tears**

John was in the middle of having lunch with Ronon when he heard a near-hysterical voice calling him on the radio. "Colonel Sheppard? This is Lieutenant Brooks. I--" She sounded ready to burst into tears. "You s-said you could help with Aiden if, if you weren't doing anything…"

"I've got some time, Lieutenant," he said, already standing up. "Where are you?"

"I-in my quarters, sir." Her voice broke on the last word.

"I'm on my way."

XXXXXX

John could hear the baby's cries growing louder as he approached the door. He waved his hand in front of the sensor, wincing at the rise in volume when the door opened. "Evie?" he called, for the hall was empty.

Evie was in the corner of the room, bouncing Aiden up and down in her arms, desperately trying to get the baby to stop shrieking.

"Evie, what's wrong with him?" John asked, walking over to her.

"I don't know," she answered, and John saw that Aiden wasn't the only one crying. "Take him," she said, handing her husband their screaming child.

"What do you want me to do with him?" John asked, concerned by how distressed Aiden was.

"I don't care! He won't eat, he won't sleep, he won't _shut up_!" she replied, her voice breaking and more tears falling. She handed John a warm bottle and a baby blanket.

"Evie…I do have a meeting in twenty minutes," he commented, gently rocking the crying baby in his arms.

Her bottom lip trembled. "John, you_ have_ to take him," she begged, almost sobbing. "I've slept maybe nine hours in the last four days, and if I don't get some sleep, I don't know what I might do. Just take him and make him shut up before I do something crazy…"

John looked at her a bit skeptically. "Evie, you're not--"

"John, I'm not kidding," she pleaded. "I don't want to hurt him, but I'm so frustrated right now I could smother him with a pillow."

He looked a little stunned. "Are you serious?"

"John, I haven't slept for _four days_," she said, her voice sounding like she was ready to drop. "And Kate says I probably have post-partum." She looked up at him, her tired eyes pleading. "Please?"

He nodded. "I'll take him." He switched Aiden's position so that the infant was snuggled up against his chest. The boy's crying didn't even pause.

Two tears of relief slipped down Evie's cheeks. "Thank you," she whispered, then stepped forward and kissed his lips.

"Does he need to eat?" John asked.

"He doesn't _need_ to eat for two more hours," she answered, walking over to her bed, "but if it gets him to settle down and sleep, then I don't care."

John watched as Evie collapsed on her bed, not moving to get comfortable or even pull back the covers; she could probably sleep for days. "I'll keep him until tonight," he offered.

She nodded and wiped her eyes, knowing how lucky she was that he was willing to help. She'd have to do something special for him later.

John picked up Aiden's diaper bag and turned to leave. Just before opening the door, he looked back and quietly said, "I love you." But all he heard in reply was peaceful snoring.


	4. God

(takes place after Evie and John are married, but before she gets pregnant)

* * *

**Prompt #45 - God**

"I don't believe this," Elizabeth said, unable to trust what she was hearing.

"This is worse than the time that Robert thought Trevor was Sancho Panza," Radek commented.

Elizabeth nodded in agreement. "Why was he the only one affected?"

"My guess would be because he's the only one who drank the wine?" Rodney offered sarcastically, the answer obvious. "The natives told us that the _nakatali_ was for the leaders of the clans only; that's why they only gave it to him."

"Did they also tell you how long the effects would take to wear off?"

"A day," Rodney said. "Two tops."

Elizabeth looked down to the observation room, at John who was still arguing with Ronon. "Well… If he's not any danger to anyone or anything, I think we should let him go and just wait for him to return to normal."

"Fine, but don't be surprised when he starts making demands," Rodney warned.

"I think I can handle it," Elizabeth said with a confident smile.

XXXXXX

"I swear, if you don't stop following me around, I'm going to tell Dr. Weir to lock you up, sir," Evie promised.

"Surely you cannot expect me to just walk away from such exquisite and unparalleled beauty?" John asked.

Evie made a show of rolling her eyes, but his words left her with a warm, fuzzy feeling. "Just…stop hovering, please, sir?" she asked, trying to finish the favor Michael had asked of her.

John sat down in a chair a few feet away. After watching her for a minute, he declared, "You will share my bed."

Evie choked on her coffee and the other three scientists in the room all turned and stared at Colonel Sheppard. The whole city had, of course, been informed of his condition, but it was still an amusing sight to behold.

"Sir?" Evie managed, wiping the coffee off her chin.

"We will go this instant!" he decided cheerfully, crossing to her and taking her hand.

"Go where?" Evie asked, attempting to withdraw her hand.

"To my chambers! To share in the pleasure of each other!"

Evie could hear the other three snickering. "I don't think so, sir," she answered, managing to get her hand out of his grasp.

He looked shocked. "Are you refusing to share a bed with your god?"

She rolled her eyes, hoping the drug got out of his system soon. "Yes. I'm refusing to sleep with you."

"But I am your _god_!" John maintained. "You should be _honored_ that I would offer you this divine pleasure."

"While I'm sure it would be 'divinely wonderful,'" she said, exaggerating the words and making quotation marks with her fingers, "I think I'll pass."

When she turned back to her work, he threatened in a dramatic voice, "I could punish you for this."

"Guess I'll have to take that chance, sir," she said, not looking up.

"Rodney!" John called into his radio. "This woman refuses to share my bed."

Rodney could be heard on the other end muttering, "Oh, for pete's sake. Do I have to _babysit_ you… Who are you hitting on, Colonel?"

"Lieutenant Brooks refuses to come to bed with me," John answered self-importantly.

Rodney tried to disguise his immediate laughter with a cough. "Refusing is entirely her right, Colonel," he informed the delusional pilot.

"But I'm her god!"

"No, you're not," Rodney said for what had to be the hundredth time that day. "You're a _Colonel_ in the US Air Force; you're not a god."

"Silence, Rodney!" John ordered. "Speak such blasphemy again and I shall be forced to punish you as well."

Rodney grumbled into the radio just loud enough for John to hear, "Yeah, okay, whatever…"

Realizing that he wasn't going to get any help from his underling McKay, John returned his attention to Evie, who was still working at a computer station. He narrowed his eyes at her, then grabbed her arm, pulled her to her feet, and kissed her soundly.

Caught off-guard, she just stood there for several seconds before remembering that there were other people in the room and that she should be fighting him off. Knowing that he had a good grip on her and that a shove probably wouldn't do it, Evie reached up and slapped him.

John reeled backwards, dropping her arm. "Of all the insolence!" he cried, bringing a hand to his cheek. "You will _pay_ for what you have done to your god!"

"I'm sure I will, sir," she said. "But you know what? I'm done with the computer, so I think I'll just be leaving now." Thus said, she grabbed her folder and ran out the door.

XXXXXX

"I refuse to eat this rubbish!" John said, hurling his tray to the ground. "I am your god, and I wish to be treated as such! Now, woman. Cook me something worthy."

Mya frowned and looked like she might just whack him with her spatula.

"Sheppard, just leave her alone and eat the food," Ronon said, pulling on John's arm.

John yanked free. "I will _not_ be bossed around by you! I demand that this woman cook me a feast right now! I--" John suddenly brought a hand to his head. "Whoa…" he said, feeling very dizzy.

"Easy," Ronon said, leading Sheppard back to his chair.

"What is happening to me?" John asked, slumping over against the chair. Ronon didn't answer. John clutched his head as he began seeing stars. Then just as suddenly as it had started, the dizziness went away. He opened his eyes. "Ronon?"

"Yeah."

He straightened. "What just happened?"

"I dunno. How do you feel?"

"Hungry," John answered. "What's for dinner?"

"Mashed potatoes and roast beef."

"Sounds good; I'm starving."

Ronon grinned. "Good to have you back."

XXXXXX

About an hour after the drug had finished wearing off, John got his memories back.

And he immediately began apologizing.

He saved Evie for last and went to visit her quarters around ten that night. He found her beside her bed, folding laundry. She looked up when she heard the door open, then turned back to her clean clothes and asked, "Feeling better?"

"Yeah," John answered, slouching against the door frame. When she didn't say anything else, he spoke up. "So… Apparently I made a pretty big idiot of myself today."

"Did you now?"

"Rodney's always teased me about having a Kirk complex," he continued. "I guess a god complex is just the next step up."

"I guess," she echoed.

"So, I've just come from apologizing to a lot of people."

"That's good."

"And I saved the best for last."

"Oh?"

"I'm sorry for embarrassing you in the lab."

"And…?" she prompted.

"And what? You want me to apologize for kissing you? I know you liked it!"

He saw her pause in her folding and grin. "Maybe just a little…"

She heard his footsteps approaching, but still jumped when he slid his arms around her waist. "Will you share my bed, Evangeline?" he murmured beside her ear then began kissing her neck.

"I think…I could be persuaded to…" She giggled when his lips tickled her skin.

"You know, there's something you should apologize for, too," he said.

"What's that?"

"You slapped me!" he cried, indignant.

"Oh, yeah." She giggled. "Sorry."

"Are not. What am I going to do with you?"

"You said were gonna punish me," she reminded coyly.

"Mmhmm." He took her shoulders and turned her around to face him. "And I can think of a hundred ways…"

"Sadist."

"Tease."

"Cocky flyboy."

"Are you gonna get those folded clothes off the bed so we don't wrinkle them?"

She bowed exaggeratedly before him. "As my lord commands."

John grinned.


	5. Dream

(takes place when Aiden is seventeen)

* * *

**Prompt #26 - Dream**

John didn't usually indulge in daydreams. There was no point to them and he knew there were more productive things to do with his time. But today was a Saturday and he had nothing better to do. Evie was off doing something with Summer, Rodney was busy, and Aiden was doing homework. John had claimed a couch in the rec room after lunch and spent a while watching Radek and Lorne play foosball. Then he'd read the comics page that he snatched from Michael's newspaper. He'd brought a book, but he didn't really feel like reading it.

When the others in the rec room quieted down to watch a movie John had seen before, he closed his eyes and let his thoughts wander. He knew his life could have turned out so different, and sometimes he let himself think about what it could have been like. What if Evie hadn't been in the Air Force… What if he had never joined the Stargate program… What if they'd never had to keep anything a secret…

_John couldn't keep from smiling as the car rounded the corner, turning onto his street. He wanted to tell the cab driver to step on it, but noticed the school zone light flashing ahead and he kept quiet. _

_Three months of leave. He was so excited he could hardly stand it. He felt nostalgic as he looked at the familiar landmarks on the residential street. He smiled when he saw the fire hydrant that Leslie had crashed into on her bike. And there was that damn peach tree in full bloom even though it was October. _

_The taxi pulled into the driveway a minute later and John quickly paid the man and grabbed his duffel. He stepped out of the cab and shut the door. He grinned when he saw the face at the window quickly disappear. He was only halfway up the sidewalk when the front door burst open and a little boy with dark, wavy hair ran out. _

_"Daddy, Daddy, Daddy!" the three-year-old cried, racing out to meet his father. _

_John dropped his duffel and reached down to grab his little boy. He tossed the chunky toddler up in the air and then hugged him tightly. "Hey, Trig! I missed you, little man!" _

_"I misted you, too, Daddy!" little John III said, clinging to his father. "I was by da window and I's been watching for you all day!" _

_"I bet you have." _

_"Daddy!" a female voice called. _

_John looked up to see his daughter and oldest son running towards him. Leslie practically tackled him, throwing her arms around his waist and nearly knocking him over. _

_"Hey, princess," he said, wrapping his free arm around her. "And happy birthday! I'm so sorry I missed it." _

_"It's okay, Daddy," she promised, still clinging to him. "Eleven's not a big deal anyway. I'm just glad you're home." When she realized that her older brother was waiting for his turn, she reluctantly let go of her father and reached up to take Trig. _

_"Hey, Dad," Aiden said, wincing when his thirteen-year-old voice cracked. _

_John pulled his son into a hug. "How've you been?" _

_"I'm good, Dad," Aiden answered, not really big on hugs, but not wanting to let go either. _

_"How's your girlfriend? Amy, right?" _

_Aiden smiled as he stepped back. "She's great. She's coming over tomorrow so you can meet her." _

_"I can't wait." John looked up at the house, hoping to see someone else coming out. "Where's your mother?" _

_"She's on the phone with Grandma," Leslie answered. _

_"Does she know I'm here?" _

_"I don't know," Aiden said. "She was in her room with the door closed, so she might not have heard us shouting." _

_John grinned and picked up his duffel. "Then I'll surprise her." _

_Once inside the house, John sent Trig ahead. The little boy opened the door to his parents' bedroom and toddled inside. Evie looked up when she saw her son. He approached the bed and began petting the family cat that was relaxing there. Evie smiled and returned her attention to her phone conversation. "Yes, mom. I'll call you when he's here so you can pick the kids up for the evening… Oh, the seventeenth?… Yeah, that sounds fun. Let me check." Evie stood up and began flipping through the calendar on the wall. _

_Now that the door was open and she was distracted, John entered the room and walked quietly across the carpeted floor. When he was directly behind her, he said, "Tell her you'll have to call her back." _

_Evie gasped at the sound of his voice. She whirled around and the phone fell from her hand. "John!" she squealed, jumping into his arms. _

_John held her tightly. "I missed you so much," he murmured. _

_She kissed his neck and sighed happily. "John... Oh, ten months is too long, baby." _

_"I know." She lifted her head from his shoulder and he captured her lips in a steamy kiss. _

_Evie whimpered and surrendered control, melting against him and tangling her fingers through his hair. _

_Leslie giggled as she watched her parents, Aiden rolled his eyes at their passion, and Trig picked up the forgotten phone. "Gwanma? Ya, is Twig. Mommy will call you back, Gwanma," Trig said. "Her and Daddy is kissing." _

_ John and Evie didn't seem to even hear their son and Leslie laughed again…_

"Dad!"

John looked up, startled. "Huh?" He saw Aiden staring at him expectantly.

"I called you, like, four times," Aiden said.

"Oh. Sorry."

"What were you daydreaming about?"

John shook his head. "Nothing. What's up?"

"I'm bored and wondered if you'd come fly the jumper with me." He held up a gym bag full of gear and grinned. "We can bring the paintball guns and play last man standing on the mainland."

John smiled. "Alright. But no ramping up the ball velocity like last time," he insisted. "I'm not walking around all day with an ice pack on my butt again."

Aiden laughed. "Wimp! C'mon, let's go."

John smiled as he followed his son to the jumper bay. Daydreams were nice, he decided. But reality was so much better.


	6. Temptation

(Takes place after Summer and Michael get married, and before John proposes to Evie.)

* * *

**Prompt #1 - Temptation**

"Could I please have some more _dudoli_?" Evie asked, holding out her cup.

Bronu the servant nodded and refilled her glass.

"Go easy on the punch, Lieutenant," Johnson warned. "I'm not going to have Akerly-- I mean _Murphy--_ pull the Jumper over every half hour on the way back so you can relieve yourself."

"Yes, sir," Evie said. "It's just really good."

Bronu grinned as he stood against the wall.

"It _is_ really good," Michael agreed, taking another sip from his glass.

Now Bronu snickered, but he quickly regained his composure when his mistress gave him a stern look.

"Do tell us more about your world," Lady Katra said.

"Yes," Lord Simmja said, nodding. "Living in the city of the Ancestors must be incredible." He took a large drink of _dudoli_ from his glass.

When no one else jumped at the opportunity to talk, Michael spoke up. "Atlantis is amazing. We could study the knowledge the Ancients left behind for years and still have barely scratched the surface…" As he continued with the standard, non-sensitive overview of the extraordinary city, he noticed that the room seemed to be growing uncomfortably warm. He glanced over at Summer and saw that she was fidgeting as well. He also noticed that her black tee hugged her body very nicely… He rambled on about Atlantis on verbal "auto-pilot" as his thoughts soon turned unprofessional. Maybe he and Summer could sneak off to the Puddlejumper… Just for a few minutes…

A second later he caught himself. Michael realized that as a newlywed he was allowed to have those thoughts, but he'd always prided himself on being able to keep his and Summer's personal relationship from interfering when he was off-world. Clearing his throat, he concluded with, "But going off-world is actually my favorite part of the job." He glanced at Summer again and she gazed back at him, then licked her lips in a suggestive fashion.

Michael gulped. Didn't the rest of them notice how _hot_ it was getting?

"Dude…" Evie said. "Does anybody else feel…ummm…"

Johnson nodded. "You mean a little…?"

There was a cry from the end of the table when Lord Simmja realized what was happening to everyone, including him. "Bronu, you insolent boy!" he shouted. "Did you put _bowchi_ in the _dudoli_?!"

Bronu burst out laughing. "It is the Day of Imbeciles, Master!" He chuckled heartily. "And I have fooled you, all of you!"

"What's _bowchi_?" Summer asked, though by the way she felt like throwing Michael down on the table right then and there, she thought she already knew.

"It is a very strong aphrodisiac that our people make," Simmja answered, pulling his robes tighter around himself.

"Well, that's just great, sir," Johnson said. "Is there any way to counter the effects?"

Simmja shot his wife a longing look. "There is _one_ way…"

Johnson nodded with a wry smile. "I figured."

"Bronu will be punished for this," Simmja assured them with a cross glare at his servant. "In the meantime… I know this is highly irregular--" He blushed. "Would it be possible for us to adjourn and meet again? At a better time?" He looked at his wife again.

Johnson nodded. "Yes, sir." He glanced at his team. "I think those two are going to burst into flames if they don't get back soon, anyway."

Not taking her eyes off Michael, Summer asked, "Permission to go prep the jumper, sir?"

"Go." Summer quickly stood up to leave.

"Sir," Michael began, pinching the inside of his thigh quite hard. "When we get back to Atlantis, umm…"

"Yes, you're free to go 'get it out of your system,'" Johnson chuckled and actually made air quotes.

"Thank you, sir," Michael said with obvious relief.

"Well that's just peachy for y'all," Evie snapped. "But what the heck am _I_ supposed to do?"

"I could throw you in the lake," Michael offered. "That would cool you down."

"You are very lovely," Simmja commented. "Why not just find a nice man -- _any_ man -- and get him to help you?" He winked.

Evie groaned and bit her lip. Her and her morals. Stupid, stupid morals…

"When we get back, just lock yourself in your room, Lieutenant," Johnson offered as the three of them stood to leave. "Or--" He smirked. "You could go hang out with the guy you're least likely to jump."

XXXXXX

"So, Rodney…" Evie said, wandering around his lab. "You working on anything interesting these days?"

"You know that you and I have different definitions of 'interesting', Evie," Rodney said, trying to work on his laptop.

She bit her lip hard. "Can you please just distract me? I don't care if it's boring."

He sighed. "Fine. I'm trying to process all the information I just got from the main console in one of the newly discovered rooms. See, at first, the console wouldn't respond, so I had to try several methods to bypass its Ancient security protocols…"

Evie found herself watching him intently as he chattered on, gesturing with his hands. Mmm, his hands… Darn it, why did she suddenly find technobabble to be a turn-on?!

"And so when I inserted the _long_ crystal into the slot, the console was naturally very receptive, an--"

Evie groaned. "Rodney, I have to go."

"Why?" The members of Johnson's team had told only Elizabeth and Carson of their unfortunate predicament, and poor Rodney couldn't for the life of him figure out why Evie was looking at him like that.

"I have to go work on something," she said, heading for the door. "By myself!"

Utterly confused, Rodney started to ask, "Was it something I--"

"If Elizabeth needs me, tell her I'll be in my quarters!"

XXXXXX

Evie had been in her room for a little over twenty minutes, and was just getting control of her lustful thoughts when there was a knock on her door. "Enter," she called, knowing Elizabeth had said that either she or Carson might come check on her later.

When she spun around in her chair and saw John entering her quarters, she knew all her efforts spent channeling her energy into her game of Zoombinis were about to be undone.

"Hey," he said, leaning casually against the doorframe. He was wearing a t-shirt and jeans. Who told him he was allowed to wear _jeans_?! "Wanna watch a movie or something?" _Or something_ almost always entailed making out and missing most of said movie.

"No!" she said with more emphasis than she meant to. When he raised an eyebrow at her, she sighed and said, "I mean… Gah! You can't _be_ here!" She stood up, intending to shoo him out, but then she realized that maybe keeping her distance was better.

"I was careful," he assured her. "Nobody knows I'm here."

"No, John, that's not the point. I--" This was _so_ awkward, and the especially naughty thoughts running through her mind weren't helping. "Please, you just-- You really need to go."

"Evie, what's wrong?" he asked, starting to get a little worried. "Are you mad at me?"

She tried to quickly think up some excuse, but then he started walking towards her and all she could think of was how unbelievably attractive he looked in civvies.

"Did I do something to make you mad?" he repeated when he was standing in front of her.

"No," she managed, clenching her fists and trying her best not to reach out and grab him.

"Then what's wrong?" He lightly placed his hands on her waist and that was all it took.

Evie stood on her toes and captured his lips. She wrapped her arms tightly around him as her kiss became more aggressive.

Confused by, but not opposed to her actions, John pulled her closer against his body and tried to control the kiss.

Having none of that, Evie bit his lip and then shoved him backwards onto the bed.

When she straddled him and began kissing the side of his neck, John's red flag reluctantly went up. "Evie…what's gotten into you? You don't--"

"Shut up, shut _up_," she begged, sliding a hand under the hem of his shirt.

He grabbed her wrist. "What the hell are you doing? Y_ou're_ the one who told _me_ this was off-limits."

"John…"

"Did something happen off-world?" he demanded. "'Cause you're acting like a… a cat in heat or something."

She stopped kissing his skin. After a moment, she mumbled, "My whole team got a large dose of a freakin' aphrodisiac, okay?" God, this was embarrassing.

He pushed her off him enough so that he could see her face. "Are you serious?"

"Yes," she answered somewhat angrily. "And I've been climbing the walls for two hours, so we're gonna do it until I'm satisfied." She leaned down and claimed his mouth again.

John kissed her back, but when he realized that in about ten seconds she wouldn't be the only one with strong urges, he knew he had to make the choice. Fighting every shred of instincts, he grudgingly rolled her off him and pinned her wrists to the bed.

"What are you doing?"

"This isn't what you want, Evie," he said, though it was going against everything _he_ wanted.

"I know, but..." She struggled against his hands.

"No. You said you were only going to give this to one man, and that's not me." He watched a tear of frustration slip down her cheek. "Maybe it will be someday, but I don't know that. And I'm not going to let you throw that away because some alien drug got you a little worked up."

Sniffling, she tried to turn her face into the pillow. "You have no idea what this feels like," she said quietly.

"Evie, I'm a _guy_. Of course I know what it's like. You'll find another way to get it out of your system."

"I want to but I don't think I can…" she whimpered.

"Yes, you can." He released her wrists and got off the bed.

"What are you doing?"

"Here." He tossed her shoes onto the bed. "Put 'em on."

"Why?"

"Just do it!"

Evie wiped her cheek and complied.

When she was finished lacing up her shoes, he took her gently by the arm and walked her to the door. "Run," he said, commanding the door open.

"What?"

"Run. I don't care where, just run. Push yourself as hard as you can."

"Why?"

"Because when you finally make it back here, exhausted, sex will be the last thing on your mind. Now, _go_!"

Evie nodded and started running.

As John watched her take off, a part of him hated himself for passing up what might have been his _one_ chance to bang her. Then the nicer, honest part of him told the first part to shut the hell up. John rubbed a hand over his face, then made a beeline for his quarters and a cold shower.

XXXXXX

The next morning after breakfast, Evie asked around until she found John in the gym. He was working by himself with the punching bag. When he saw her, he teased, "Am I safe to be here alone with you, or are you gonna try to jump me again?"

Evie blushed. "I'm much better, thank you."

"Good to hear." He resumed punching the bag.

A moment later, he felt her hand on his shoulder. "John?"

He stopped the swinging bag and turned around. "Hmm?"

"I…" She looked out the window and took a deep breath. "I know I wasn't myself last night…but that's no excuse for how I acted."

"Evie, don't even worry about it," he said. "Wacky alien drugs get the best of all of us at least once."

She smiled. "Still, I wanted to apologize for…'jumping you.'"

He shrugged. "I just took it as a compliment."

"_And_," she continued. "I wanted to thank you." She finally met his gaze. "For stopping me. I know that probably wasn't the easiest thing for you to do since I was throwing myself at you. And I'm fairly certain you stayed up all night wondering why the heck you didn't just let me have my way with you."

John looked just a little uncomfortable at the memory. "It's not a big deal…"

"Baby, it's a _huge_ deal," she insisted. "The fact that you respect my commitment _that_ much makes me… It makes me really grateful that you're my, umm…whatever you are."

"Commanding Officer-slash-boyfriend?" He smiled.

"Yeah…" They shared an affectionate gaze for a moment, then she hugged him. "Thank you, John."

He held her close. "You know why I did it, right?"

"'Cause you love me?"

"Mm-hmm."

She lifted her head to gently kiss his lips, then rested her head on his shoulder again. "I love you, too."


	7. Fragile

**Prompt #21 - Fragile

* * *

**John found himself studying a full color poster of the human muscular system. Evie and baby Aiden had both fallen asleep, so he'd decided to take a break and stretch his legs. Besides, if he stayed in there any longer, just watching Evie sleep, Emma and the other nurses were going to start getting ideas…

"Good evening, sir."

_'Speak of the devil,'_ John thought, turning around to see Nurse Emma. "Evening."

"It's certainly been an exciting day, hasn't it, sir?" She was grinning. "I'm glad Dr. Beckett let me help him with the delivery."

"It was pretty exciting," John agreed. "Was it your first…delivery?"

"Oh, no, sir," Emma answered. "But delivering babies is always wonderful. I was actually just on my way to check on him."

"Mind if I tag along?"

Emma shrugged. "Lieutenant Brooks is probably still asleep, but you can hold the baby if you want."

"Really?"

Emma nodded. "She was very specific about who was allowed to hold him." She giggled. "She said that if Dr. McKay wants to hold him, he has to be supervised."

John laughed and the two of them entered the private room. Evie was still asleep, curled up on the hospital bed. When they reached the bassinet, they saw that Aiden was fussing very quietly.

Emma leaned down and picked him up. "Wassamatter?" she cooed, cuddling him gently. "Let's change you, little man." She laid a changing mat in the bassinet and gently changed his tiny diaper.

"What the hell is that black thing?" John asked, pointing at Aiden's stomach.

"That's his umbilical stump," Emma explained, snapping up the buttons on the baby's onesie. "It'll fall off in a few days and he'll just have a belly button." She threw the used diaper and the disposable mat in the trashcan and gently picked up the baby, who was nearly asleep again. Emma smiled at John. "Would you like to hold him, sir?"

"Are you sure?" John asked, staring at the baby.

She nodded. "All I needed to do was change him. I've actually got some paperwork and filing that I needed to catch up on."

"Okay…"

Emma carefully placed the baby in John's arms. "Watch his head," she reminded. "If Lieutenant Brooks needs anything when she wakes up, I'm in the on-call room."

"I'll let her know."

Emma nodded with a smile, then turned to leave.

When John heard the door quietly close behind her, he looked down in awe at the infant in his arms. Aiden was so small, so fragile, so innocent. John thought he was the most beautiful thing in the world. And with the genes he'd gotten, he'd be a handsome young man someday, John thought with a smirk.

Aiden made a quiet grunt and his head fell to the side, resting against John's chest.

"Hey, little guy," he said softly. "Guess what? I'm your daddy. But don't tell anyone, okay?" Just saying that out loud felt weird to John. He couldn't believe he had a child now. Sure, he'd always wanted children. A kid or two had always been in his long-term, American Dream-type plan. But he'd never thought he'd actually get there, especially not after marrying Evie. He knew she'd always wanted a baby, too, but procreating within their difficult situation was a discussion that they'd always put off and never actually ended up having until she was already pregnant.

Damn condoms.

As soon as he had that thought, he dismissed it. John didn't care if it made things hard -- he didn't even care if it got them busted -- the little boy in his arms was now the most precious thing in the universe to him.

He carried the baby over to the rocking chair that had been placed next to Evie's bed. He sat down carefully, trying not to disturb the sleeping newborn. Apparently he wasn't at smooth as he thought, because Aiden's eyes cracked open and he yawned. "Hi, buddy," John smiled. "I didn't mean to wake you up." Aiden opened his eyes wider, apparently interested in the sound of John talking. "Evie says I'm supposed to talk to you so you'll learn, but I feel kind of silly having a one-sided conversation with you. I mean, you're only a few hours old; for all you know I could be speaking Japanese."

He noticed that Aiden's fuzzy blue cap was about to fall off and reached up to gently tug it back into place. "Where'd this come from?" he wondered aloud. "Did Rodney give you this one? Where's the one _I_ got you? The one with the ducky…" He brushed his fingertip softly against Aiden's cheek. "Why are all babies so soft, huh?" he asked the child.

When Aiden felt the finger gently stroking his cheek, he turned toward John's hand, opening his mouth. "What are you…" Aiden started to suck on the end of John's finger. "Oh. No, this is a finger, not a… Look, buddy, mommy's asleep. Can we just rock? C'mon, you're not really hungry…" He started the rocking chair moving with his foot. A moment later, John smiled and said, "See, I knew you weren't really hungry. So I got you this book that I really want to show you. It's a plane book and it's got pictures of all the different kinds of airplanes and helicopters. I think you'll like it. I also got you this other one wi--"

"Mm, I thought you said you felt silly talking to him."

John looked up and saw Evie smiling at him.

"Hey, sweetheart." He smiled back.

"Hey." Her voice still sounded tired.

He carefully got up and moved to perch next to her on the bed. When she sat up and propped her pillow up behind her back, he leaned over and kissed her. "How do you feel?"

"My vagina hurts," she deadpanned.

John snickered. "I'm sorry."

"Tell Emma I need an ice pack."

"For what?"

"My vagina!"

He grimaced. "I think that's more than I needed to know."

She laughed. "Well, you asked!" She looked at their newborn in his arms and smiled. "We make pretty babies, John."

He grinned. "Yeah. Do you want to hold him?"

She shook her head. "I'll be holding him plenty. I want you to hold him as much as you can so that he'll attach to you."

"So we're bonding already? Just by me holding him?"

She nodded. "And by you talking to him."

He looked down at the boy, who seemed very content. "I think he likes me."

There was comfortable silence for about a minute, which was then interrupted by Aiden starting to fuss.

"What's wrong, Aiden?" Evie cooed.

"He was acting like he was hungry a few minutes ago, so maybe he needs to be fed," John said, gently handing her the infant.

"Wait a sec." She began fiddling with her gown. "Ugh, there's no easy way to do this in these stupid hospital gowns." She managed to get enough of the garment off and then reached for Aiden. "I still have no idea what I'm doing here," she mumbled, cradling the baby so that he could nurse. "C'mon… There ya go." She paused thoughtfully for a minute. "Does Nurse Emma know you're in here?"

"Yeah."

"Isn't she a little curious as to why you're sitting with me and the baby instead of Rodney being here?"

John shrugged. "Do we care?"

Evie shrugged back. "Not really."

"Well, if she suspects anything, she's not letting on. Just pray that no one ever demands a paternity test."

"John, don't even say things like that. If an--" She stopped suddenly and looked down at her son. "Dude, slow down. My breast isn't going anywhere, I promise." She let her head fall back against the pillow and there was a relaxed silence again. When she looked over at John a few minutes later, she caught him staring. "Yes," she said.

"What?" he asked, startled out of his thoughts.

"Yes, my breasts will eventually go back to the size they used to be."

"I wasn't--"

"Yes, you were," she smirked.

"Well, they'll stay like that if I knock you up again, right?"

Evie made a face. "I feel like I just gave birth to a bowling ball; you're not touching me for at least a month."

"A _month_?" John whined.

"And there will be no more 'knocking up', Colonel," she said with mock sternness. "This kid is a little bit of you and a little bit of me, so you _know_ he's gonna be a handful."

"Yeah, but he's gonna be cute and smart and very, very talkative."

"And he'll be into everything," Evie added.

"And he'll probably annoy the crap out of Rodney."

Evie laughed. "Where is Rodney anyway?"

"He needed a drink."

"There's water over there," she pointed out, nodding toward the pitcher and cups on the counter.

"No, he needed a _drink_," John said, emphasizing the last word. "He said he was gonna be traumatized for life."

"_He_ did not just shove an eight-pound, two-ounce human being out of his body." Evie looked down and then chuckled. "He totally just fell asleep while feeding." She positioned him so that he was lying comfortably on her arm, then readjusted her gown. "This is how I like 'em," she joked. "Angelic and quiet."

"He's so beautiful," John whispered, admiring his tiny son asleep in his mother's arms. "He's got your nose," he observed.

"And your elf ears," Evie teased.

He chuckled. "What are people going to think if this kid looks more like me than he does McKay?"

"At this point, I really couldn't care less," she said, pulling him in for a kiss.


	8. Bury

(takes place on Easter, a few days after John, Evie, and Aiden went back to Earth via the Gate Bridge for the first time.)

* * *

**Prompt #14 - Bury**

"Where are you off to?" Rodney asked when he saw Evie holding a small Easter basket and John holding a picnic basket.

"He's flying us to the mainland," Evie answered. "Aiden wanted to have a picnic."

"Aren't you worried about…y'know…" Rodney gestured. "Compromising your secret?"

Evie looked at John and pretended to look confused. "We have a secret?" she asked, playing dumb. "Aiden and I just needed a pilot." She smiled innocently.

"Wouldn't it have raised less suspicion to ask Summer to fly you over?" Rodney pressed.

"Summer's busy with her own family," she replied. "Colonel Sheppard offered 'cause he doesn't have any plans. Are you and Mary doing anything? Any special Easter traditions?"

"I do have one," Rodney answered. "It's very big in my family; we've been doing it for years. It's called the Easter Nap. It's wonderful."

Evie rolled her eyes. "You guys have fun with that. But next year you can totally bring your girls to join Aiden in hunting Easter eggs."

"Oh, I'm sure they'll be there," he said. "In matching pink dresses and bows."

She laughed. "See you later, McKay."

XXXXXX

"That was a good picanic, Mommy!" Aiden said, licking cherry filling off his fingers.

"All I made was the pie, honey," she answered, putting everything back in the basket.

"But it's da bestest part!" He grinned.

Evie laughed. "Let Uncle John clean your face."

John pulled a wipe from the basket. "Buddy, how did you get pie in your _hair_?" he asked, amused, as he tried to clean the sticky tangle.

Aiden giggled. "I dunno!" He closed his mouth while John cleaned his face. When John moved to his hands, Aiden asked, "Unca John…howcome you got to come wif us today?"

"Well…your mom asked if I wanted to come because I didn't have anyone to eat lunch with."

"'Cause you don't gots any kids?" Aiden asked.

"That's right," John nodded.

"Ohh…" Aiden thought about this for a moment, then he looked back up at John with a grin. "I can be your kid today!" he announced happily.

John had to smile. "That sounds great. Are you ready to go find the Easter eggs?"

"Yeah!!" Aiden jumped up and grabbed John's hand, attempting to pull the pilot to his feet. "Let's go, Unca John! Mommy, where's my basket?"

"Right here, honey," Evie said, handing Aiden a colorful woven basket.

Aiden grinned and ran into the field where John and Evie had hidden the eggs. "I got one!" he cried, bending down and picking up a blue egg. He was about to put it in his basket, when he changed his mind and opened it instead. "Candy!" he exclaimed, cramming the jelly beans into his mouth.

He saw a pink egg a few yards away and eagerly dashed over to retrieve it. When he opened it, he found a red Hot Wheels car. He gasped and ran back to John and Evie, crying, "Look, Unca John, it's a _car_!"

"No way! That's awesome!" John answered with over-the-top enthusiasm to match Aiden's.

"C'mon, let's find mo'!" Aiden said, taking John's hand and yanking him towards a purple blob in the grass. "Mommy, I doing good!"

Evie laughed. "You're doing very good, honey."

He gasped excitedly. "Oh, look! Dis one has chockit!" He placed it in his basket. "This is the best day _ever_!"

John and Evie just laughed.

XXXXXX

"'All at once he saw something small and round. "Why, here's my button!" he cried. And he tried to pick it up. But, like all the other buttons on the mattress, it was tied down tight.'" John turned the page. "'He yanked and pull--'"

"Baby, you know he zonked out, like, three pages ago, right?"

John looked down at the toddler in his lap. Aiden was, indeed, asleep. "He was running around like a crazy person ten minutes ago and now he's drooling on my shirt. What's the deal?"

"Sugar rush," Evie answered with a grin. "A short energy high, followed by a crash."

"So, what do you want me to do with him?"

"Try to lay him on the blanket without waking him up," she instructed.

John tossed Corduroy aside and gently shifted Aiden off his lap, laying him on Evie's fuzzy blanket.

"So what's on the agenda now that he's asleep?" Evie asked. "Am I gonna sit in your lap while you read _me_ a story?"

John shook his head. "Nope. I've got a little surprise for you."

"Does this have anything to do with that bag you had hidden in the picnic basket?"

"It does. When was the last time you went on an Easter egg hunt?"

Evie thought for a minute. "Probably when I was ten. Why?"

"I hid a few for you while you were taking Aiden to do his business."

Evie's face brightened into a smile. "Really? Aw, this is so much fun!" She giggled. "Where are they?"

"Back this way," he pointed. "Just in the area of the first ring of trees or so."

"How many are there?" Evie asked, already looking.

"Ten."

"Got one!" Evie announced, pulling a pink one from amongst some flowers. She giggled. "Oh, this brings back memories." Suddenly, she laughed loudly. "Oh, man. So we were watching home videos when I was home with my parents the other week, right?"

"Yeah?"

"And there was this one of me in pre-k, so I would have been about three. So my pre-k class is having our little Easter egg hunt, and I'm following my friend Beth and she leans over to pick up an egg--" She had another fit of laughter. "Sorry! So she leans over to pick one up, and I reach into her basket and start taking her eggs out and putting them into _mine_!"

"Evie, you're so awful!"

"I know!" she giggled. "And I was only _three_!"

John laughed.

"Ooh. There's another one."

A few minutes later, Evie had a pile of nine eggs. "Johhhn," she whined. "I can't find the last one. You didn't _bury_ it or something, did you?"

"No. In fact you're standing right next to it."

Evie turned around. "Where?"

"Right there! If it were a snake it would have bit you!"

"Oh!" Evie grabbed a green egg from the tree branch. Then she picked up her pile of colorful eggs and sat down next to him on the blanket. She opened a pink one first and pulled out a small chocolate bunny. "Mm…chocolate's always good."

"Uh-huh."

She opened a blue one and instead of candy, found a slip of paper. She uncurled it and read, "'Because I love you, I will…put Aiden to sleep for you.'" She paused and looked at him. "What is this, like a coupon?"

"Yeah. I used to give things like that to my mom every Mother's Day. She loved 'em."

"Awesome." She opened three more containing candy and then found another one that said, "Because I love you, I will…babysit Aiden."

Evie smiled. "You know this is _Easter_, right? Not Valentine's Day?"

"Well, I thought you'd appreciate these more than just candy!"

"No, I do, I just… Well, now I feel really bad that I didn't do anything creative for you."

"Hey, you came up with a legit excuse to let me come out here and spend time with you and him; that's more than enough."

She smiled. "Letting me go on my own egg hunt was really creative, too."

"I have to give credit to Summer for the eggs, actually. I was just gonna put it all in a little goodie bag for you, but she said you'd enjoy hunting for them."

"But the prizes were your idea?"

"Mm-hmm."

She smiled again and reached for the next egg. She was surprised to find a movie ticket inside this one. "Oh my gosh, how in the world did you already get tickets for the new Wolverine movie?!"

"I know a few people in Colorado Springs," he answered.

"And it's for the midnight showing!"

"Yeah. I know a couple of other people from Atlantis are planning on going, so it won't seem so odd that you and I are."

"Well, I can't wait." She reached for and opened the elusive green egg. "'Because I love you, I will--'" Evie blushed and crumpled the paper. "John!" She hit his shoulder and he laughed.

"What? You didn't think they'd all be about taking care of Aiden, did you?" he grinned.

"Apparently not…" She opened the next egg and read the paper silently. "Aww," she said, then turned and hugged him. "You are so sweet."

"I have my moments," he replied.

She leaned in to kiss him and froze when she heard Aiden stirring.

"Mommy?"

Evie's heart skipped a beat, but she relaxed when she turned around and saw that Aiden was still lying on the blanket, facing the opposite direction. She turned back and quickly pressed her lips to John's. "Happy Easter," she whispered.


	9. Ghost

Takes place in 2012, when Aiden is six.

* * *

**Prompt #46 - Ghost**

"You _idiot_, how could you _possibly_ think that?" Rodney scoffed.

John immediately looked up from his laptop. He didn't approve of his friend insulting his wife, but before he could open his mouth, Evie zinged Rodney back.

"Well, _excuuuse_ me, Mr. Smartypants," Evie retorted, offended. "Not all of us went to college for eight years."

"Well, maybe more of you should have."

"So then we'd have _more_ condescending buttheads? I think I'll pass."

John, who had now decided to stay out of it, snickered.

"Why are you even here?" Rodney snapped at her; he'd just gotten a horrible tongue-lashing from Weir about something that wasn't even his fault, and he wasn't in the mood for Evie's ever-curious and slightly annoying "What ya doin'?" routine.

"I came to ask if you could help out at the carnival tomorrow night," she answered.

"Why?"

"Because you have kids and we could use volunteers, but if you've got a full schedule of people to insult, I understand."

He sighed in frustration. "What do you need me to do?"

"Just help out at one of the stations. Help the kids decorate the pumpkins or something."

"Fine. Is that all?"

"Yes. Be in Meeting Room Two by 6:30 tomorrow; that's where we're setting up."

Rodney turned back to his work, thought for a moment, and looked back up at her. "Why doesn't he have to help?" He nodded at John.

"I already volunteered to take Aiden around the carnival and trick-or-treating since Evie's working at the face-painting station," John answered with a smile.

Evie smiled back. "'Cause he's awesome like that. And Aiden's super-excited; he's been talking about it all week. Now don't forget, we'd like both of you to come in costume if you can."

"Already covered," John replied.

"What is it? What is it?" she asked, bouncing.

"I _told_ you," he answered with a grin, "it's a surprise. You'll find out tomorrow night. But I promise you're going to like it."

"I'll tell you mine," she bribed, batting her eyelashes.

He made a motion with his hand of sealing his lips.

"Oh, fine. McKay, you got something to wear?"

"Do I have to?"

"Yes, you have to. Don't be such a party pooper. Wear a bloodied lab coat and come as a mad scientist. Wear a freaking bed sheet and be a _ghost_. Surely you can use your ginormous brain to come up with _something_ creative?" she taunted.

"What are you dressing up as?" he sneered back. "One of the seven dwarves?"

"Oh, I get it," Evie said with a wry smile. "Because I'm short. So then are you going as the Michelin Man?"

Rodney turned to John. "She went there."

John shrugged, not looking up. "You started it."

Evie threw her hands up. "You know what? I don't even care. Dress up. Don't dress up. Whatever." She bent down to kiss John. "We'll see you tomorrow night," she smiled.

"I can't wait."

XXXXXX

When Evie heard the knock at her door, she quickly grabbed her face-painting supplies. "Honey, Uncle John's here. Hurry and get your bag."

"I forgot where I put it," he said, looking around his mother's quarters.

"Well, hurry up and find it," she said, waving her hand to open the door, "'cause we have to…go." Evie lost all focus when she saw John standing in her doorway.

She knew immediately who he was supposed to be when she saw the tan trousers, the whip at his side, the worn leather jacket, the faded fedora. She'd thought he'd looked good last year, when he'd dressed as Clark Kent, but this… She bit her lip.

Evie wasn't the only one staring. John's eyes were glued to the light green mini-dress his wife was wearing. The bottom hem was cut in a large zigzag pattern above her knee. The dress was made of a shimmery material and the bodice hugged her figure. She was wearing a pair of sheer, white fairy wings and had painted her face with sparkly green and white designs on her cheeks beside her eyes. She probably even had pixie dust hidden somewhere.

He was so never going to be able to watch Peter Pan again.

"Oh, here it is, Mommy," Aiden said, grabbing his pumpkin-shaped trick-or-treat bag from her bathroom. "I'm ready." When he got no response, he walked over to stand by his mother. "Mom, I'm ready to go."

Evie and John still didn't register the small voice. They couldn't take their eyes off each other's not-intentionally provocative costumes, their minds were lost in what were probably very similar fantasies.

"_Mom_." Aiden poked Evie.

"Oh! Right. You're ready to go." She blushed a little beneath her face paint. "Uncle John's going to take you around while I stay in one spot and paint faces, okay?"

"I know, mom, you already told me." He sounded impatient.

"Alright, then let's go."

"Your costume looks awesome, buddy," John said with a smile.

Aiden grinned. "I know." Then he dashed out the door, crying, "To infinity and beyond!"

XXXXXX

"Alright, Aiden, I think this is the last door," John said as Zelenka put a piece of candy in Aiden's bag.

"Now we can go watch the movie?" Aiden asked.

"Yeah, it's in the rec room. I'll drop you off there."

"Where are you going?" Aiden asked, pulling a lollipop out of his bag and unwrapping it.

"The grown-ups are having a party in the Great Hall in a little while."

"Oh." He thought for a minute. "Can I come to your party with you, Uncle John?"

Sheppard laughed. "I don't think so, buddy. But your party sounds like more fun, anyway. The kitchen staff made you guys _lots_ of cookies and you're going to watch _Hocus Pocus_!"

"Oh, I like that movie," Aiden smiled around the lollipop in his mouth.

"Awesome."

When they got to the rec room, they saw a table covered with cookies and other goodies. All the bean bags were in front of the TV and the oldest two Murphy children were running around the room, obviously on a sugar high. There was some glitter sparkling on the ground, but they didn't think anything of it.

John saw Summer standing by the snack table. She was wearing a light pink princess gown with off-the-shoulder sleeves that reached down to her wrists. A small gold crown sat on top of her hair, which she had obviously curled.

"Enjoying your evening, Sleeping Beauty?" he asked.

Summer snickered.

"What?"

"I just think it's funny that you knew I was Sleeping Beauty and not just a generic princess, sir."

"Hey, I end up watching a lot of Disney movies when I babysit," he defended himself.

"If you say so, sir." She looked across the room at where Aiden had joined in chasing Aaron and Skylar. "Oh, his costume is too adorable."

"Well, so are your two. Pebbles and Bambam? Classic. So where's your Prince Charming tonight, Princess?"

"He's putting Kyle to bed. Mary's going to help me tonight when she gets here with her girls. There will only be six kids, so we'll be fine."

"Am I free to leave then?"

"Yes, sir."

John laughed as he watched Aiden tackle Aaron. "I know he's full of sugar, but don't let him get too crazy or hurt anyone."

"I'm sure we can handle them, sir," she smiled.

"Alright then, Princess. I bid you goodnight." He made an exaggerated bow.

She laughed. "Oh, Colonel, wait!" she said when he turned to leave. She picked up an envelope off the table and handed it to him.

"What is this?"

She shrugged innocently. "A fairy gave it to me."

John pulled a small note from the envelope. When he unfolded it, gold glitter fluttered out. "What the…" He recognized Evie's handwriting. _How about a little treat before the party, Dr. Jones? Second star to the right and straight on 'til morning. Just follow the pixie dust…_

He looked back at where he'd seen the glitter earlier and now saw that it formed a little trail that lead out the door. He grinned up at Summer.

"Let me guess. You have the best wife ever, sir?" She winked.

"Uh-huh." He looked over to Aiden and called, "Bye, Aiden. Have fun!"

"Where you going?"

John grinned. "Neverland."


	10. Wrong

"Morning, sir," Evie said, approaching John's table at the end of breakfast. "Do you feel like being my hero today?"

"Evie, I already told you," John teased. "If you want to get rid of Rodney, you'll just have to kill him yourself."

Rodney rolled his eyes and reached for John's blueberry muffin. "Funny."

"No, I was thinking a little less murder, a little more babysitting," Evie said, gesturing to the small, sleepy four-year-old holding her hand; the boy was still in his blue Thomas the Train pajamas "I'm the lucky lieutenant chosen to go help Zelenka and his geek entourage on some backwater planet." She sighed. "Scientists are so helpless. Anyways, I'd have gotten Laura or somebody to watch him except Johnson just told me two minutes ago that I have to go."

"Well, I--"

"Go tell Uncle John how much you miss spending time with him," Evie said, gently pushing her son toward the pilot.

Aiden stumbled forward tiredly, but managed to ask John eagerly, "Can I stay wit' you today?"

John had to smile. "Sure, buddy. I have to go talk with Elizabeth after breakfast, but then I can spend the rest of the day with you."

Aiden grinned. "Yay!" Then he yawned and rested his head on John's lap.

"Aww." John ruffled the boy's hair. "Why is he so tired?" he asked Evie.

"He didn't get much sleep last night," she answered. "He'll probably be a little cranky later in the day."

"We'll manage, won't we, buddy?"

"Uh-huh."

"Thank you, sir," Evie said, then bent down to her son's level. "Bye, honey." She kissed his forehead.

"Bye, mommy."

"So, Aiden, what do you want to do today?" John asked as Evie left.

"Play wit' my new trains. And play wit' Aaron."

"That sounds fun. But first I have to go meet with Elizabeth. If you're super good and play quietly while I talk to her, I'll let you get some pie at lunch, okay?"

Aiden lifted his head and smiled. "Okay!"

XXXXXX

"Hey, buddy, you gotta eat your lunch before you can have pie," John pointed out.

"But I want it _now_," the four-year-old protested.

"I know, but you have to eat your lunch first." John took a bite of his own green beans as an example. "Look, even I have to eat my veggies so I can stay big and strong."

Aiden frowned and reached for his desert plate.

John quickly picked it up and set it on his tray, out of Aiden's reach. "Aiden, I said no. Eat your lunch."

"No."

"'Yes, sir,'" he corrected, something Evie was working on with the boy.

"No!" he cried, yelling now. "I want my pie!"

"Aiden," he said sternly, "don't yell at me."

"I want pie!" Aiden shouted, tears starting to trickle down his cheeks. "Gimme my pie!" He started pounding on the table with his fists. "Gimme my pie!"

"Aiden, if you act like that, you won't get pie at all."

Aiden screamed at John, then got out of his chair and threw himself on the floor, kicking his feet and bawling angry tears. "I…want…my…pie!" he sobbed.

As John got down on his knees next to his distraught son, he was glad that the colony was used to the children's behavioral outbursts; most of the others in the mess hall continued with their meals without anything more than a curious glance at the noisy child. "Aiden, if you're going to throw a temper tantrum, do it in your room. I'm going to count to three, and if you don't calm down, I'm going to throw your pie away. One…" Aiden let out a loud sob and kicked his feet one last time. "Two…" Aiden rolled over and buried his face in his hands, trying to quiet his sobbing.

"Alright," John said, seeing that the child was attempting to calm down. "I'm going to finish my lunch. You come back to the table when you're ready."

Two minutes later, Aiden had stopped sniffling. He looked up at John and wiped his nose on his sleeve. Then he got up and shuffled back to his chair.

"Are you ready to eat your lunch now?"

"Yes, sir," he said, reaching for his sandwich.

When Aiden had finished eating, he asked, "Now I have my pie, Uncle John?"

"You finished your lunch so, yes, you may," John answered. "But I don't want to see another temper tantrum like that again." He handed him the pie plate. When Aiden took the plate and was about to dig in, John prompted, "What do you say?"

"Thank you!" he said excitedly.

"You're welcome."

XXXXXX

"Na-na!" Aaron stuck his tongue out at Aiden. "You're ugly like a Asgard!"

"Nuh-uh!" Aiden cried. "You're ugly like a _butt_!"

Aaron gasped and his bottom lip started trembling at the same time as John reprimanded, "Aiden, we don't say that word."

"Ugly butt!" Aiden laughed and climbed up onto the bed that the boys shared. "Ugly butt, ugly butt!" he shouted as he jumped up and down.

"Aiden, if you say that word one more time, I'll wash your mouth out with soap."

The boy stuck his tongue out at John and continued bouncing on the bed.

"He's in a fine mood today, isn't he?" Michael commented, reaching over to tie Aaron's shoelace.

John sighed, annoyed. "He's having a bad day because he didn't get enough sleep last night and he's tired," he explained. "Aiden, stop jumping on the bed."

"I don't wan' to!" he said, defiantly continuing to jump.

"Aiden, get off the bed _now_." Bounce, bounce, bounce. "Aiden, I want you off the bed by the time I count to three or playtime's over. One… Two… Three…" John reached for Aiden's hand, but the child pulled away and moved further up the bed. John stood up and grabbed him around the waist, yanking him off the bed.

"Nooo!" he cried as John set him down, still holding onto him.

"Why don't you two go see what Summer's doing?" John suggested to Michael. "Aiden and I need to have a serious talk."

"No!" Aiden shouted, knowing what he meant by that.

"Okay," Michael said. "Don't get blood on the floor. Come on, Aaron." He took his toddler's hand and they left the boys' room.

"Aiden, look at me."

Noting the authority in the pilot's tone, Aiden reluctantly met John's gaze.

"Playtime's over because you wouldn't stop jumping on the bed when I told you to."

"No!" Aiden wailed dramatically.

"You wouldn't obey and this is your consequence." Evie was big on making sure that Aiden understood punishments and John attempted to follow her example. "Now help me pick up the toys."

"Don't wanna pick up!" he shouted. "I wanna play!"

"Aiden--"

"No pick up!" he screamed.

"Aiden, you're going to pick up the toys or you're going to get a spanking," John said sternly.

Aiden screamed at him, then picked up his toy train and hurled it against the wall.

John grabbed Aiden by the shoulders. "Aiden Nathaniel, you do _not_ throw your toys. That was your last chance."

"No!" Aiden protested, starting to cry. "I don't wanna punishment!"

"Well you should have thought of that before you disobeyed me again and again."

Aiden jumped when he heard the door to his room whoosh open. They both looked up and a fresh round of tears trickled down Aiden's cheeks when he saw his mother standing there.

"Honey, what's wrong?" Evie asked, worried.

"I don't wanna punishment!" he wailed, then yanked free of John and ran to hide in the corner behind his dresser.

"Bad day?" Evie asked John.

"Where do I start?" John answered, clearly frustrated. "He threw a temper tantrum at lunch, which I completely let slide. Then he wouldn't stop jumping on the bed when I told him to. And then when I told him he had lost his playtime, he started screaming at me and throwing toys!"

Evie looked over at the small boy whimpering in the corner. "I'm sorry, John. He didn't get enough sleep last night and that's why he's so cranky; but that's still no excuse."

"Yeah…" He glanced back over at the boy and then asked quietly, "Can you give us a moment? He still needs a spanking."

Evie nodded. "Just remember to do it in love. Make sure he knows exactly what he did and--"

"Evie, it's not like this is the first time," he cut her off. "I know the drill."

She reached for his hand and gave it a quick squeeze before dropping her arm. "Thanks. I'll come get him after while."

"We'll be here." He watched her leave, then ordered the door closed. He turned and saw Aiden huddled in the corner and looking up at him with tear-filled eyes. John sat down on the edge of the bed, thinking about how to phrase himself. A moment later he said, "Aiden, come here."

"Yes, sir," Aiden mumbled, his voice still a little choked. He stood up and walked slowly over to the bed.

John leaned down so that he was facing his son. "Do you know why you're in trouble?" he asked. Aiden nodded and sniffled. "Tell me what you did wrong."

The boy inhaled shakily. "I yelled at you. And--and…I throwed my toys."

"And why is that wrong?"

"'Cause I'm not being 'spectful to you. And to the toys. You saids I lost my playtime today."

"Yes, you did. Because when you throw the toys, you're either going to break them or hurt somebody else. And it's never okay to yell at anyone, especially a grown-up. That's not your right."

"I know, I sorry," Aiden said sincerely, a tear slipping down his cheek.

"I forgive you, but you're still going to get a spanking to help you remember that you can't act that way, no matter how upset you are." He saw Aiden's eyes widen and dart to John's belt. "I'm punishing you because I care about you and I want you to know what's right and what's wrong, understand?"

Aiden nodded as a fresh tear slipped down his cheek.

"Alright, now turn around."

XXXXXX

When Aiden's crying stopped a few minutes later and John saw the boy come out from the bathroom, John put down the picture book he was looking through. "Aiden?" he called.

"Yes, sir?" the boy replied quietly.

"What are you going to do when your mom comes to get you?"

"Be good," Aiden answered.

"That's right. You're going to be on your best behavior, aren't you?"

Aiden nodded.

"Good. I don't want her to tell me that you were being disobedient anymore today. Do you understand me?"

"Yes, sir. I be _so_ good!" he promised.

"Okay. C'mere." Aiden approached the bed and John picked him up and hugged him. John felt Aiden wrap his arms around his neck. John turned his head and kissed Aiden's cheek. "I love you."

"I love you, too, Unca John."


End file.
